my last entry to you

I believe you must have been very upset.. in the first place, we're just quarelling over time issues.. how it escalated to money and eventually breakup... till now i don't even know why. i wanted you to spend more time with me.. it's a promise you made to me.. that after you quit this job, you find me more but you didn't.. ofcoz i envy melvin and angeline or steph and her bf who'll meet almost everyday.. have lunch together go out together.. but i understand that your someone who needs to balance your time between friends and family..so i guess there's nothing i can do yea?

and you tell me your broke, that's why you couldn't come and find me..how much does it cost to come to hougang? i can go to jurong if you want me to.. and we won't spend much money too.. we can always cook lunch instead of eating outside.. watch downloaded movie instead of heading down to the cinema.. like i say im not asking you to bring me to some extravagant restaurants or whatever.. just you and me watching tv and talking rubbish at my house.. ain't it just simple yet full of love? you had no money but you can play mahjong.. and go out with your friends.. but coming to meet me is too expensive for you.. am i that materialistic in your eye? it pains me you know.. to see you wanting me to understand that your broke but time and again you went out with friends and spend money more that you go out with me..


You know, if you love someone, you'll tell her to go back to you.. not ask her to find someone better should there be people wooing her. i ask for a changed of status in facebook to " in a relationship" you tell me your afraid guys will not dare to woo me if i change my status.. do you know what does this show? it shows you don't love me anymore. i'm not a toy for you to cuddle and love ..then throw away or give it away to someone else just because you have no confident in our love. it breaks my heart to hear all this from you.i cried almost everyday when i recalled what you say.. i don't know what you told your friends.. i have nothing to say anymore..all i ever wanted was to stay by your side even when your poor and support you and give u love.

Put yourself in my shoe. One day when i'm poor, and i say:"let's break up. coz i'm bankrupt and poor" will you leave me?

think.

that's all i have to say to you. All the best to you.. i'll try my utmost to move on since that's what you wanted. good luck for your new job and please fucking stop smoking if you know you don't have a healthy body. stop eating instant noodle just because your lazy to go downstairs to buy food and share your computer with your brother. You have a good bunch of friends by your side and im sure you've move on alr.

And last but not least, please remember that i once loved you.

Jingxuan'2010